Been Caught Shopping

Early reports from the employees of a Denver area Priced Less warehouse store say that coworker Janet Conti is doing some shopping on her day off. The staff are understandably amused and somewhat bewildered to see their cohort in her street clothes and running an errand that is in no way related to her job as a store merchandiser.

“Did you see Jan is here shopping today?” says one worker in the store’s break room. “I thought she was working today but I guess not!”

“So weird to see people out of uniform,” says another. “Almost like she’s an entirely different person!”

Eyewitnesses on the sales floor have stated that Conti has been seen browsing the clothing section as well as the snack food aisle.

“Doing some shopping today, huh?” said sales worker Richardo Mando as Conti passed through his area of the store. Others in the area have attested that Conti did reply in the affirmative she is indeed shopping today.

“I remember when I used to work in a movie theater,” says floor supervisor Randy Beckett. “Employees would come in all the time to see movies when they weren’t working and I’d be all ‘Oh hey, you here to watch a movie today?’ and they’d be like ‘Yep!’. Good times….”

While most would obviously delight in seeing a sight such as an employee suddenly taking on the role of a customer, others are not as tickled to see Conti shopping today.

“Hey, why don’t you go clock in and give me a hand here!” derided fellow merchandiser Todd Whitehall. Whitehall would later go on to claim his inappropriate demands for Conti to work on her day of rest was a joke despite the clear implication that she doesn’t belong in the store if she isn’t toiling to create shareholder value. Whitehall also claims his comments weren’t misogynistically motivated, though he has no way to prove that.

“I recognized her from a time I was here before so I asked her to show me where the juices are,” says customer Rhonda Miller, “and she said she couldn’t because she was off the clock. As if it would really take that long to walk me over to that section and tell me which low-sugar juices tasted best! Real nice work ethic they’re raising these kids with these days!”

Some of Jan’s coworkers, like cashier Mark Rivera, worry about the adverse effects of coming to the store while not scheduled to work.

“You wouldn’t catch me here on my day off, that’s for sure!” said Rivera as he rang out Conti’s order. “Get as far away from here as you can, girl!”

Others, however, were not lucky enough to witness the event at all.

“Oh man, Janet was shopping here today!?” asked Nora Williams who works the aftersales counter. “I’m sorry I missed her! Guess she didn’t have anything to return, huh?”

“I didn’t get to Jan today either,” says sales worker Miles Brown, “but we work together Friday and I’m totally going to tell her ‘Hey, heard you came shopping here the other day!’.”

As Janet exits the store with her moderately discounted goods, the excitement dies down and the monotony of the job returns, but not without leaving behind the memory and sense of awe for what had unfolded here over the twenty minutes or so Janet Conti was shopping. The Priced Less staff really has something to look back on and smile about as they trudge their way towards closing time. We can only wonder though how long it’ll be before one of them needs to do some shopping on their day off so they too can be the subject of such remark and whimsy….